One, too many times we are forced to be strong, for ourselves or for others. Showing and feeling emotions is seen as a weakness. Meaning anything we should be feeling is usually disregarded, masked or escaped, but is that good?
They say distract yourself, keep yourself busy, focus on something else, remove the reminder from sight, but, is that enough? What does suppressing emotions do to us? Do we become insensitive and, what happens after that? Are we still human? Do you still think men should show strength by not showing emotions, if not, they are less of a man? We forget they are also human, they should also feel and express themselves. They can also cry and be sad.
You should allow yourself to feel, as it the closest you can get to healing and facing your demons. It is you dealing with it the right way, by feeling it now and expressing yourself now, you’ve eliminated any grief you’d feel in future. Yes, feel those negative emotions, the sadness, grief and anger, because in most times we don’t escape the positive ones. If you do break down in future, it won’t be as bad. You’ve dealt with it now and you will get over it sooner. Something you can teach will be learnt.
Suppressing emotions is like, buying on credit. Yes, you’re enjoying the benefits of the credit now, but you took something from your future. You are not free to spend all the money you will have in future because of this debt, it’s the same with supressing emotions. Some day, it will all come back and claim the happiness you think you will have, then. Before that, you will have to carry the burden of having that negative feeling, how inconvenient.
What about the one that was raped and never dealt with it, in the past? The one who grew up in an abusive environment and never got help? Yes, it does eat you alive, it does haunt you, it comes back! Emotions are meant to be felt and expressed, if not, they turn into something more. They build something inside. They gain undeserved strength in you suppressing them and they will own you. There’s a consequence for ignoring your feelings, you may not see it now, but you will see it some day.
Consciously, you found a way to avoid whatever emotions, but subconsciously you haven’t. The subconscious then needs to find a way to free itself, in a partly similar way to how you would initially feel if you didn’t avoid those emotions. The only difference is that it could be worse or even take longer to recover. It could be depression or something more. Just know that it threatens your health, mentally, emotionally and physically.
By avoiding the feeling, you haven’t really eliminated it. You delayed and worsened the sorrow. Express yourself by talking to someone, writing or by merely getting a punching bag. All that matters is that, you didn’t internalise it, it’s out there. All that matters is that, you felt it and dealt with it. You will then have happiness and relief.